Freeeedoooommm!

My wife decided to try to burn down the house this morning when her toast went full mushroom cloud. So, I opened the backdoor to air out the smoke. Since it was a nice day, I left the door open for a little bit. Angel was in hog heaven. She could go outside or come inside at her leisure. And she did…back and forth…back and forth. She was so giddy and excited. I could imagine these thoughts going through her head.

“This is the best…day…EVER! I love being a dog! Ooh, squirrel! Let me check that out. He got away. It’s okay, I’ll go get some water and check the food bowl. Nope, it’s still empty. I think I’ll go chew some grass. Wait. Did I check the food bowl? I can’t remember. I’ll check it again just in case. Nope, it’s still empty. That’s right, I did check it. I remember now. Oh my god! I must get that leaf. Die, interloper! Whew, I’m thirsty. I’m going to get some more water. Look at that, the food bowl is still empty. Maybe if I lick it, I can make some food appear.”